Not recognizing our cars.
Nov 25th by Jon- Tagged in:
- god,
- serious wednesdays,
- sin
It’s always good to have a friend who is a cop and I’m excited to say I just met one. His daughter goes to kindergarten with mine and we walked around together on Halloween night. I peppered him with the kind of questions a 7-year old boy would ask McGruff the crime dog but he humored me. And then, he told me something a little surprising …
International drug cartels use caravans of different cars to run drugs through Georgia.
I read about that in article but secretly hoped the organizational savvy of cartels that are now using a Wal-Mart approach to outsourcing their crimes was exaggerated. He assured me it was not. Here’s how it works:
When a drug cartel is going to drive drugs up from Miami or Texas, they use three different cars …
The first car is kind of the “smoker” car. Its only job is to go 100MPH and smoke out any cops that might be on the highway. Its role is to get a speeding ticket and pull the cops out of their hiding places.
The second car is the disguised car. They often use unassuming elderly couples in boring looking vehicles to actually move the drugs. This car looks normal but could be carrying millions of dollars of drugs.
The third car is the popper. Its only job is to protect the car with the drugs. When the popper sees the police chasing the disguised car, it speeds up and pulls in front of them. The popper then slams on his brakes, forcing the cop car to rear end it. The cop car’s airbags pop off. When that happens, the car is automatically disabled and turns itself off. The cop is now officially out of the chase.
I was fascinated listening to him talk about the strategy involved in an operation like that, but realized ultimately that approach wasn’t that original of an idea. For me, the sin in my life works in a pretty similar fashion.
The smoker sins in my life are the big, neon, obvious stuff I deal with. These are the things I see coming a mile away. To be honest, those are usually lust and porn related. Right before an important speaking engagement or a key moment with God, something will unexpectedly tear down the highway of my life. A contact from my old life will email me after years of silence. Like a cop watching a car do 100MPH I’m tempted to get distracted or lost chasing the smoker.
The disguised sins in my life are harder to spot. These are the things that look like really great opportunities. They’re not so obvious in their deviousness. It just looks like an SUV with a family on vacation, but inside the shell of normalcy are hundreds of pounds of poison. Right now, these are probably new opportunities I’m being offered. It would be really easy to say yes to every opportunity I get to go speak or write. I could say yes and yes and yes over and over again, not realizing that doing so means I’m saying no to my family. No I won’t be there multiple weekends in a row for my daughters. No I won’t pour into my own family because I’ve got pour into a freelance project instead. Some of the opportunities I need to say yes to, but some aren’t the right fit and distinguishing between the two is a challenge.
The popper sins are those ones that stop you dead in your tracks. You’ve spotted the disguised sin. You’re eliminating it from your heart when all of the sudden something pulls in front of you, slams on the brakes and your car is disabled. For me, that’s pride. I’ve started to feel self righteous and prideful about how I am deliberately growing the Stuff Christians Like ministry. And what was initially a good thing, me going after the disguised sin of over committing myself turns into something gross. It turns into pride and I find myself with busted air bags on the side of the road with a car that won’t work.
I’m not sure if you ever feel the same way, maybe you don’t have three cars in your life that are constantly trying to wreck you. But if you do, I encourage you to think about them. Start to see them coming. Know deep down that the drug cartel’s methods are tiny and ill planned compared to how the devil is plotting to ruin your life right now. And pray that when God shows you what those three cars are, He’ll show you what to do.
Today, let’s play fill in the blank. Finish these sentences:
1. My smoker car is ____________
2. My disguised car is __________
3. My popper car is ___________
Comments
My smoker is usually gay premarital gay sex. Then I have it and then I feel so relieved but kinda guilty. But you know, sex
Praying for you, friend (and for all of us, after reading through this list)
Gotta love serious Wednesdays. It doesn't matter how much I forget it's Serious Wednesday, and come here looking for a laugh, start reading, then…uh oh….
But I do love Serious Wednesday. And if you're serious in your confession above, Bryan, God bless you, and thank you for starting it off.
This is a tough Serious Wednesday Jon. I know I have problems with self-image and self-esteem. Lust, and abusing prescription drugs. Arrogance, and self-pity. I just don't know how to separate them. But, it made me think hard about what I struggle with daily, admit them "out loud", and maybe come to God with them. I can't help it, I just love SCL.
Thanks for that comment. And I'm the same, wrestling with the weird mix of arrogance and self pity. They're opposite but weirdly related.
Jon
I've heard Beth Moore talk about how self-pity is a form of pride. Because while you're so down on yourself, you're still focused on….yourself. So I they aren't too opposite and weirdly related!
I don't know if I can tease it all out into the categories; it's all usually a big ball of despair and anger. And then all of the guilt I pile on myself for the despair and anger. Which leads to more…well, you get the picture.
Smoker car – procrastination (waiting for the next e-mail, reading blogs, etc.)
Disguised car – I have to work on the computer – it's part of my job. It looks fine. Everything seems to get done.
Popper car – I don't get all of my mommy & wifey duties done when I have the chance because I'm on the computer – then kids come home and WHAM! I have double duty and they get a cranky mommy instead of a refreshed and ready to go mommy.
I have a hard time working this one. Jesus has even been screaming to me "SELF CONTROL my child!!" and I finish my reading, pray and go to the computer.
uh. wait! I better go.
right there with you.
ditto!!!
Ugh – you are SO RIGHT about that…
And yes, I'd better go too!! (and turn Diego off and feed the kids breakfast instead of surfing…)
Dang! Are you reading MY screen? *looking for the cameras*
This is SO me. It's what kept me up till 3 a.m. last week before a trip with a small group. D'oh!
Wow, I can't believe other people struggle with the same thing as me! My job is a stay-at-home-mom, so the work I procrastinate doing is typical house work. I used to be a working mom too so I totally understand the challenge of being a full-time worker bee AND a full-time mommy, but I was laid off from my job (worse, it was while I was pregnant!), and, well, that's a different story entirely.
Anyway, I am SO addicted to being on the computer. I think a lot of has to do with the fact that I don't have many friends close by (just moved to a new area), so I heavily depend on social networking to satisfy those relational needs. My kids, sadly, get my "left over" time. I think I've convinced myself that since I'm with them 24/7, my computer addiction isn't a problem. But it is.
Thanks for sharing, it makes me feel better to know I'm not alone.
I don't think I would have classified this as one of my problems. Ouch! It totally is!
Thanks, I really needed that.
Thank you. I was having a hard time coming up with a list. The I read yours. BOOM! Wrecked on the side of the road.
Logging off now to get ahead of my mommy & wifey duties.
Thanks!
I know what you mean.
I got hot reading your post…you described me to a T! Oh, it seems so inocent…I am just reading a blog, just checking my FB blah blah blah..all the while, laundry is piling up, dishes need to be done, my todo list is a mile long. I claim that while my kids are napping it is MY time and it is…my time to get the things done that I can't while my kids are awake…but I would so much prefer to sit and do nothing but play online. When I was pregnant my church did a church wide fast, I fasted technology instead of food. (I think fasting food would have been easier.) I really should do that again. God would love for me to spend the same amount of time with him that I spend online.
Bingo. It's so easy to get wrapped up as the time ticks by. Thank you for sharing. And Amanda, your reply really hit home… I often give my kids the tired, cranky, "leftover" mom – and I think the guilt and conviction only fuel it more. I was thinking of starting a one-day-a-week break from technology, like web-free wednesday or something, and I'm sure God will use it to show me how much time I actually DO waste and how productive a real day can be when I'm not looking at a glowing screen!
Also, Mother Runner, I feel your pain. I'm also displaced with hardly any friends locally, so I enjoy using e-mails and facebook to connect with family & friends "back home."
I suppose it would be counter-productive to send friend requests to ya'll? LOL.
Now, to just back…away…from…the…computer!
This is soooo me. The part where you talk about the Popper Car, especially. Thanks for saying it plainly.
dear goodly. Did I write this and forget? I'm sure I didn't… but I totally COULD HAVE. A little scary how you can describe ME with such accuracy. Like another commenter, I have very few local friends (ok, 1- the life's worth of relationships are in another country! waaa!) so I get needy and this is where it ends up .. but it is still not the answer. Bless you for fessin' up, Sister!
I'm working on this one too!!
What I heard the Lord say to me one day, "get off the bench and get in the game!"
D'Oh! Point taken…. : )
I had a great post and it disappeared. That’s what I get for posting from the phone.
Really great post. I know I struggle with the same kind of problems as you. The big sins are getting easier to deal with but those last two are a struggle. Here is how it plays out for me.
Huge list of things to do and then I get another great idea for growing the church. I start to pray about it and try to decide if it is a good idea to add another "thing" on my plate but then I get hit with "this needs doing and you are the only one that can save the church." Yeah if that isn't pride I don't know what is. I've always been like this and the only thing I know to do is force the thought out and pray to God so I know if I need to pursue every little thing I'm asked to do. I do mean every little thing.
It might seem weird that I take a day or two before saying yes when people ask me to do something as simple as write a guest post for them but if I don't then I would fill my life with a million things I don't need to be doing just because I think I'm the only one who can do it right. I would run every ministry in the church and then wake up one day with an ulcer the size of my head and no family.
my smoker car is real cool and stealthly…he's an old pro who is a great liar because he knows the truth so well
my disguised car is the family van with me looking cool as a dad
my popper car is driven by my wife who calls me to the carpet
wow, that's quite thought provoking – I'll have to think more on it but here are my first thoughts (usually right?)
Smoker Car = Distractions – twitter? watching too much TV? Even my Blogging.
Disguised Car = Time spent on the computer when I should be spending it with my Family and with God. Time disguised as work for God.
Popper car = Those web pages you open and there's something illicit in it that tempts you with lust and immoral thoughts. Wish there was a way to block that out completely.
One thought – you can use Firefox as a browser and use the Adblock plugin. It may not get everything, but it sure gets a lot.
1. Laziness & putting people before God (basically idol worship)
2. My control-freakness. On one hand it looks like a spiritual gift! I get things done. If someone needs me to make a list, I'm there. I email everyone on the Young Adult Ministry list telling them about stuff, I collect money for our trips, I come up with great ideas. It's all great until I run ahead of God and try to control him and everyone else.
3. Pride and Low Self-Esteem & Guilt. Don't know how I manage to engage in all three at once but I do.
How did you get into my thoughts like that? I'm so with you!
I think pride, low self-esteem and guilt fit quite well together. Well, they do in my life.
x
Corina, thanks for sharing your number 2. I’m struggling with how to manage my type A personality, and how to allow God to use it as a blessing versus allowing Satan to use my control issues as a way to distract me from my purpose of glorifying God. It’s comforting to know that other people struggle with the ability to let go and let God.
ok, you are in my brain. come out, come out wherever you are! These shared truths are very freeing. I hope I don't get too addicted to reading & sharing them.
somehow after watching Blow and Weeds, i always end up rooting for the drug smugglers
1.My smoker car is lust.
2.My disguised car is pride, doubt, or religiosity (all of which seem to be interrelated, and they are incredibly hard to spot)
3.My popper car is a hurried life. No time to read the word cause I gotta go to work. No time to pray cause I'm tired from a long day at work.
same for me, exactly.
Those are great questions. Being a "put together" Christian you sometimes, ok most of the time, want to say you are right on track. Yeah ok! Here is me being extremely transparent:
1. My smoker car is lust and procrastination. I know I am doing it and know that I need to avoid situations where I am tempted so that is why I watch only about 2 hours of TV a week (Football season it is a little more). Shows these days… wow. Procrastination is a huge smoker car. I know I need to be working on a certain task, but I will put it off or find something to distract me.
2. My disguised car is over-commiting myself. The things I do are good things, but are they the right things for me in this season of my life. God has me on a path and I need to know my Yes and No.
3. My popper car is my self-doubt/faithlessness/fear in situations. I know where God is leading me and what He is asking of me yet I don't trust that He will guide me through. I get the opportunity to step out on that faith and I hesitate. My fear, self doubt, and faithlessness hit me in the face at that moment and I balk instead of going to the Lord in prayer.
Great post today Jon. I apprecaite the questions and will pray about them. I am a new reader here. Thank you for sharing your humor and Jesus.
1. My smoker car is sex. My fiance is beautiful and there is much mutual attraction, so keeping ourselves honest is a daily priority.
2. My disguised car is my own self loathing. It comes in under the guise of humility and honesty, but I end up using it to tear myself down because that's what I'm comfortable with.
3. My popper car is I don't know yet… and that scares me.
My smoker car is fear and anxiety. At times, I see fear (and thus, feeling like I'm the one in control) barreling down at me at 100MPH. I do all I can to chase after it even though it's impossible to defeat on your own.
My disguised car is distraction. The enemy certainly finds ways to keep you in neutral and distracted from the priorities of Kingdom living.
My popper car is definitely self-defeating thoughts and language. When I had down the pooper feeling "not good enough," my life crashes to a halt for a day or more.
1. My smoker car is the usually sins that everyone always talks about and so I say the same thing and then talk about how I am working on those sins and how I need God's grace blah blah blah
2. My disguised car is dreaming. Ya kind of weird. But for me I dream a lot and get ahead of reality and start to get this grandiose idea of how things are going to turn out and what is going to happen. So much so that I think it is actual reality. The disguise comes when I am sitting in my office and expecting a call from so and so telling me that I am a genius and that I am the greatest. It is a disguise because no of that ever happens and I am left sitting in my office waiting.
3. My popper car is all the pride and arrogance that is wrapped up in thinking that I tricking God. The arrogance of thinking that I have my life planned out and that I can do a couple of good things and God will reward me with what I want.
First of all, thanks for making me think today. This is a great post, Jon – thank you for being so real and honest.
1) My smoker car is busyness, or "over-active-church-member." No one wants to do it (or they can't do it as well as I can)? Sure. I'll do it. And everyone will notice how talented, dedicated, educated, energetic, and helpful I am and they will pat me on the back admiring all my accomplishments, stroking my ego, all while I maintain a modest and humble demeanor without appearing frazzled…and they won't see my disguise car in #2….
2) …which is PRIDE. I think to much of myself all the time. I'm down on myself, I'm up on myself, I'm down, I'm up….not bi-polar, just not balanced.
3) My popper car is dream-atics. I dramatically dream big, I love big, I lose big, I hurt big. I have a hard time reconciling His reality with my dreams sometimes and then I wonder where the dreams came from in the first place. Is He giving me hope for the future or is the enemy messing around with me? grrr. Oh, wait…I'm thinking about myself again. sigh.
You had me at #1. I've got a lot of thinking and hopefully repenting to do. Thanks to all for the eye openers!
I simply can't divide my sins into separate cars with distinct jobs. My sins are more like bumper cars. They all pack about the same punch and never allow me to get anywhere. Worse, I just keep riding them because (the sarcasic side of me wants to insert "because bumper cars are fun" here) I am choosing one of the following excuses: "I am too tired." "I am too busy to change." "My intentions are good, so I have 'enough' grace to save me today." Ugghhhh! It really is sad to think of the time I waste justifying my sinful nature vs. attempting true change. Lord help me!
my smoker sin is my pride and arrogance…i act as though my walk with God is the right way to walk with Him, my growth is on track and my relationship is the healthiest and everyone else could learn a few lessons from me and my faith….it gets worse and worse, and even when i pray about it, sometimes i think well at least this is my sin and not something else
my disguised car is my lack of faith…i don't trust God's promises unless he delivers how i want HIm too. and He's not supposed do I want, I am supposed to submit to His will, but I constantly struggle in a lot of areas in my life because I want God to do what I want and how I want. Sometimes I don't even know how to pray because I know what I should say (God you're in control, I'll do what you say), but I really want to say, God please give me this this and this….lately I've been praying for a pure heart
my popper car, eeeeek. is sexual sins. i keep putting myself in the same situation and acting as though it will be different this time. God has given me insight into this situation and its like i'm trying to ignore it.
Stubbornness. I'm not quite sure which car it is, but it sure does drive me sometimes.
1. My smoker car is probably a combination of daydreaming and procrastination. I spend a lot of my "off time" dreaming about that one magical, special person I'm hoping God will bless me with one day, *sigh*. That and putting things off have been big ones for me most of my life, so they’re really easy for me to recognize right away.
2. My disguised car is my job. I'm an elementary school teacher, so a lot of work comes with the territory. The problem comes when I look up and I realize that all I do is work, and I’ve had to say No to other, more important things. Sorry, I can't help lead worship tonight; I've got papers to grade. Sorry God, I'm going to have to skip my quiet time tonight because I need to finish my lesson plans.
3. My popper car is definitely that magical blend of pride and self pity. Like others, I tend to think that I have to do everything because I'm the only one who can do it right. Other times, I sit around and dwell on how alone I feel. Either way, I'm stopped in my tracks, unable to accomplish anything for God.
you're not alone. you took my thoughts and made them your #1 and #3.
I don't think the devil is plotting to ruin my life per se. He doesn't put the lust or pride in my life. I do that myself. I am responsible for that. The devil doesn't need me to be a porn addict. Or he doesn't need me to have an affair. He would be completely happy with me being simply uneffective for the gospel. An addiction to porn, an affair, or any other sin like that would definitely promote my uneffectiveness for the gospel, but it isn't required. I have to focus more on the distractions that keep me from being effective, clear, and bold for the gospel. That would mean:
my smoker car = complacency (a smug satisfaction, entitling me to be lazy)
my disguised car = complacency (a smug satisfaction, encouraging me to be idependent from God)
my popper car = complacency (a smug satisfaction, allowing me to be unaware of the potential dangers that I giving to my soul, my wife's soul, and my children's souls)
Great article!
My Smoker Sin: like most guys, shamefully, I would have to confess lust.
My Disguised Sin: Pride, it's often hidden but always right there, and dangerous as the devil.
My Popper Sin: Selfishness. When things don't break my way, this one slams me with anger. Ugly.
Audi R8 aka Smoker – Lust
Volvo V70 aka Disguised – Selfishness
1972 Cadillac Sedan Deville aka Stopper- Pride (It's a little ironic that Pride comes in the form of a '72 Cadi, isn't it.)
Wow-so thought provoking…I'm going to have to give this some time. thanks for the great post.
That's a good analogy, I think.
1. My smoker car is Lust.
2. My disguised car is Drifting. From God, from thinking about him, from praying.
3. My popper car is Doubt. Wham! It hits me.
And the funny thing is, they all go together. Just like the caravans of drug cars.
My smoker car is food…it is my comfort and friend. Battled it all my life. It is my obvious and most prominent outward battle. I recognize it as the "smoker" car because, even after losing 100 pounds, I am still struggling with self esteem issues. Feeling gross outwardly and unusable inwardly. Made me have to go deeper to identify the "REAL car carrying the drugs"…
My disguised car is (drum roll, please) self-loathing/hatred. It is subtle but debilitating in the Body of Christ (and everywhere, but really damaging in a person's walk with Christ). It can be looking in the mirror and hating what you see, or as simple as hating the way you laugh or thinking you are stupid. It all negates — and is contrary to — the abiding Love of Christ and causes us to continue to seek outwardly for satisfaction. I have just recently come to realize that there was such a monster as self-hatred and that it is something that we need to repent of and be delivered from. Causes us to feel unusable and undeserving of the Father's affection and is usually "catching" to those around us as we tend to spew our self-hatred on others periodically. Still working on that…
My popper car is fear and doubt. They derail me every time. Crap.
Thanks, Jon, for such an amazing post. I really had to sit and think about this to figure out which car was which.
1. My smoker car is self-harm, in many forms. It can be going over the edge in drinking and staying up to late, or scratching/cutting myself, or even just causing old physical wounds to stay open.
2. My disguised car is anger. I'm angry at myself, I'm angry at those I love, I'm angry at God. I'm so angry and frustrated most of the time, and I have nothing I feel I can do about it. I can't stop the anger because I don't know what I'm angry about.
3. My popper car is sucidial thoughts.
Dear Someone,
I just prayed for you. If you're angry at God – tell him. Yell it at him – he can take it. He wants you to tell him how you feel.
Love,
Someone who cares
The smoker car: wrath. For a preacher, I sure can be a vicious b*tch when someone trips over my issues.
The disguised car: pride. I *can't* slow down, let go, let God, because the world can't function without my constant micromanagement.
The popper car is less a sin than a symptom: depression. It is the inevitable result of wrath turned inward, and pride-born striving for impossible standards I will never, ever meet.
Good food for thought today, Jon.
Thanks for sharing. I'm right there with you on cars 2 and 3. Reading you name number 3 the way you did causes me to think more about why I struggle with this myself.
1. Smoker- Lust, trying to maintain relationships with others. Lust is my sin, trying to maintain relationships with those I love (even those that could be harmful) is the result of me trying to make up for my failures.
2. Disguised- Complacency, laziness. I get too comfortable to do anything.
3. Popper- Pride, arrogance. What I do I take pride in, and I take pride in what I know Im capable of, despite my laziness.
Huh. I’m a little shocked about the compilation of responses here. If you look at them all from a high level something doesn’t quite seem right. I know for a fact that I have sin in my life that is detestable to Jesus, but he knows what the cars look like and can thwart them before the “drugs” get to my heart. Sorry for getting preachy, but His love surpasses all of this. It sure seems like all anyone wrote about was the smoker car.
My smoker car is fear.
My disguised car is vanity. If, by some miracle, I clear out the obvious fear, then I still can't be who I'm supposed to because I hate people to see me fail. I like to look good.
My popper car is self pity and the willing decision to live in past mistakes and allow them to shape my future.
Wow, great post again, Jon. Really hits home. I’m going to link to it from my blog; won’t be the first time, and likely won’t be the last I do that.
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