Stuff Christians Like

Jon Acuff

Bro-ears

(Today is a great guest post from Gabriel Lytle! Check him out on Twitter too @gaberuski!)

I’ve spied shell necklaces under a collar.

I’ve seen “Ice” swaying about one’s tank.

I even once witnessed pants touching the ground,

But there’s a new sheriff in town: In-ear monitors

In-ear monitors (aka “ears”) are high-tech earphones typically molded to fit snug inside your ear. You know, something a musician uses while performing.

I’m enjoying my job as a snobby barista, making lattes and denying room-for-cream, when suddenly a local worship leader walks in with them ears hangin’ low. Like, he got in his car with those on.

What’s my next move?

Do I say anything? I mean, if I won’t, even the lattes will cry out:

“Forgive me sir are those extra ears around your neck, or are you just happy to gram me?”

Instead, I give him the benefit of the doubt.

Instead, I convince myself that he hadn’t noticed two ear-molds weighing around his neck.

I tell myself, “At any moment, he’ll have to zip up his boots ‘n’ jet out of this God-forsaken coffee house, straight onto stage for a youth group that can’t wait for him to string his ears back down his shirt.”

I breathe. I assure myself it’ll all be over faster than I can say “4-count click set at 250 BPM”, when suddenly he presses his in-ears inside his actual ears (to, I honestly don’t know, listen to music maybe?).

Silver is the lining.

I sit back, call out “Latte to-go”, understanding full well… Bro can’t hear me.

Worship leader readers, (fun rhyme) have you ever done this?

Non-worship leader readers, (still pretty good) have you ever seen this?

Get every post emailed to you - click here!

Comments

  2. I wore them home after church, and did most of my Sunday morning Sabbathing (?), completely unaware that my neck was adorned with low-hanging “bubblegum” ear molds.

  3. I play on the worship team at my church. I don’t have pro in-ears but when I play do have generic in-ear stringing out my shirt when I’m on stage. but other than when I play I use those headphones everyday when i listen to my Ipod or i’m on my computer. and I must say seeing worship leader with those pro ones that are clear and have the wrap around thing makes me jealous . . . I mean even just for looks. It looks cool. If you use these type of earphones I think it’s okay to leave them strung out your shirt if your going to grab a coffee at the church coffee shop between services or in the green room. but if services are over and your at Starbucks (or Bucky’s as I call it sometimes) just put em in your backpack until your at your table actually using them.

  4. I’m a worship leader, with in ears that cost around $1,000. I use them all the time, either connected to my phone or iPod to listen to music or especially learn new songs for Sunday services. We have around one or two new songs per average to learn each week, and it can take up to 50 listens of a song to learn it well enough to lead it in church – especially learn the lyrics… So it would seem completely normal to have my in ears anywhere I am unashamedly. Considering they are custom moulded, sound better than any headphones and block out background noise, just makes sense to use them… I’m with worship leader coffee ordering guy.

    Cheers

  5. I’m the praise innovator, along with within ear which price close to $1, 000. I personally use all of them constantly, possibly attached to my personal telephone or even ipod device to hear songs or even particularly discover brand new tunes with regard to Weekend providers. We now have close to a couple of brand new tunes for each typical to understand every week, as well as it will take as much as 50 listens of the tune to understand this good enough in order to guide this within chapel – particularly discover the actual lyrics… Therefore it appears to be totally regular to possess my personal within ear anyplace I’m unashamedly. Thinking about they’re customized molded, seem much better than any kind of earphones as well as stop history sound, simply is sensible to make use of them… I’m along with praise innovator espresso purchasing man.

Connect with Jon