When I saw this typo in a church bulletin I laughed. Mostly because I am not as mature as you. Things like this tickle me.
This isn’t my church. A friend sent this to me and I figured he’d like to remain anonymous. Or not, if he wants to be known I will put his name in here and he can be nonymous. (Pretty sure that’s right.) I also didn’t blank out part of the church’s name because I googled “First Free” and there was 3.7 million responses. If you are able to figure out which church is, congratulations, you are Inspector Gadget.
In my head I immediately thought about what it would mean to have glutton free communion.
It would probably take a special squadron of ushers trained to recognize the classic signs of someone who is about to grab too much communion. The clawed hand like a kid at Halloween scooping out too many treats. The greedy, beady eyes. The nervous laughter and rotating head to make sure no one is watching. The ushers would swoop in and …what? What would they do? My heart tells me “taser” but that seems too violent. And I recently took some heat for writing about violence.
Maybe they’d come in with sanctified squirt guns ablaze, showering that glutton in discount orange drink from youth group. Maybe they’d punish the offenders, sentencing them to church jail or as you might know it “volunteering at VBS.”
Hard to say, how do you imagine a church enforcing glutton free bread?