1. Joel Osteen got $13 million for the advance of his second book.
2. Joel Osteen can bench press 300 pounds.
3. Joel Osteen once killed a polar bear with his bare hands while on vacation on Alaska.
I made up one of those facts, but the other two are from a 60 minutes special they did on Osteen. (Although I do have my doubts about number 2.) Someone as successful as Osteen was going to make the list at some point, but you might not have expected the reason. Is it because he’s got a giant globe on stage with him when he speaks? Nah, I like globes.
I don’t think he can bench press 300lbs. That is an insane amount of weight. Think about it, 300lbs is the equivalent of two small cars. There is no way he’s regularly putting that up. Me personally? I’m topping out at around 12 stones. What? You don’t measure weight in stones like our ancestors? Well then you and I are different.
Though it’s long been my policy not to mess with Texas, I still can’t believe Joel is benching 300lbs. If I ever finish my arm wrestling challenge with Texas pastor Matt Chandler, Osteen will be next. I’d write more, but I gotta go do some push ups.
