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Stuff Christians Like

The Five Love Languages

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If you’ve never read this book, I can only assume that you communicate with your spouse through a series of caveman like grunts and growls. Seriously, save for the Bible, I don’t think there is another book that has so significantly shaped the way Christian couples interact with each other. The concept of it is simple: There are five ways we like to give and receive communication. Unfortunately, sarcasm is not one of them. For instance, I like to receive words of affirmation and give gifts. My wife likes to give and receive acts of service. So if I do something around the house, like trap one of the squirrels that was living in our attic like it was a vermin penthouse, she is really happy. But if I give her lots of gifts or tell her how awesome she is, she’s not that impressed.

It’s honestly a good book, but you know Gary Chapman could not resist the urge to turn it into an empire. Here are some other versions of the original idea:
  1. The Five Love Languages Men’s Edition

  2. The Five Languages of Apology

  3. The Five Love Languages of Children

  4. The Five Love Languages of Teenagers

  5. Now You’re Speaking My Language

  6. Five Signs of a Loving Family

  7. The Five Love Languages of Gothic Teens that Listen to My Chemical Romance and shop exclusively at “Hot Topics”
One of those is fake.

(Special thanks to all the folks that suggested this one.)