I know your Aunt, who is not a Christian, loves email forwards too and in some ways you feel this topic is out of place on the list. I get that, believe me I receive my fair share of emails like that. A few days ago a relative sent me one that was a photoshopped image of two cats sunbathing complete with sunglasses on and six bikini tops to cover all their nipples. (There’s a word I bet you weren’t expecting to see today.) Who creates those? Honestly, I wish I was there when someone yelled out, “Honey! This is going to be the one! It’s a cat photo, which people love, but I added bikinis. Lots of bikinis! Get it? Honey?”
But what those non-Christian emails don’t usually carry is the threat of eternal damnation should you choose to not forward it. They never say that exactly, no one ever comes out and says, “unless you like lakes of fire, forward this email.” That would be too obvious. Instead they say things like, “if you love Jesus forward this” or “if you want God to stay in control of Ohio forward this to ten God-fearing friends.”
I like to pretend that God is up there in heaven arm wrestling Samson and checking out his web traffic on Google Analytics. “Looking good, Sammy, looking good. People are forwarding the email. My unique visitors is up, my page views is through the roof and I think this might be the viral campaign that finally gets me the attention I need.”
