Can you believe that we found 500 things we like? I didn’t think we’d make it to 50, never mind 500. This list is a reflection of you, the reader, not me. You submit the best ideas, encourage me to write all week and even gave me time to figure out the rhythm of the site. (The last part of that sentence is fancy talk for “some of the early posts stunk.”) People have asked for an index of the posts since day one and #500 felt like the perfect time to do it.
(And by “perfect time,” I mean my wife sat on our hand me down couch for a few days and organized this beast.)
Thanks for reading the first 500. I think the second 500 are going to be even better. Especially number 777 which is practically going to write itself.
Razzle “to the power of 500” Dazzle
Jon
#1. Putting a God spin on popular secular ideas.
#2. Saying “bless her heart.”
#3. Reading “love is patient” at your wedding.
#4. Books with people on the cover.
#5. Bootleg Cookies
#6. Songs with bottomless lyrics.
#7. Stryper
#8. Singing friends are friends forever at camp.
#9. Comparing Braveheart to Christianity
#10. Weird Memorabilia
#11. Thomas Kinkade
#12. Getting awesome in a certain number of steps.
#13. Adding gyms to your church
#14. Dating God instead of me.
#15. Calling satan “the enemy.”
#16. Greeting the people around you.
#17. Unspoken Prayer Requests
#18. Cross stitching bible verses.
#19. Dressing up church with cool words
#20. Psalty
#21. Saying “I thought marriage would fix things”
#22. Mixing sign language and music.
#23. Tattoos for God
#24. Church names that sound like clothing stores.
#25. Jonah, Noah and David
#26. Songs that sound Christian but aren’t.
#27. Famous Christians
#28. Rob Bell
#29. Not Dancing
#30. The end of the Harry Potter series.
#31. Occasionally swearing
#32. Lasers instead of stained glass.
#33. Singing with our hands raised.
#34. Subtly finding out if you drink beer too.
#35. Lock ins
#36. Creating new types of services
#37. Abstinence
#38. Joel Osteen
#39. Giving advice on things we’ve never experienced
#40. Ignoring the Sabbath
#41. Making music that is impossible to exercise to
#42. Putting God on your business card
#43. Metrosexual worship leaders
#44. Saying God is not funny.
#45. Getting your money’s worth out of the youth group liability form.
#46. Super Happy Shiny Christian Radio
#47. Rooting for secret Christians on American Idol
#48. Doing a mime to Michael Jackson’s Man in the Mirror
#49. Odd Sales Promotions
#50. Bible Fanny Packs
#51. Fun Mission Trips
#52. Andy Stanley
#53. Saying, “I’ll pray for you” and the not.
#54. Halloween Hating
#55. Getting a precise definition of virgin from your youth minister.
#56. Talking to strangers on planes.
#57. Not owning nice stuff.
#58. Calling people “seekers.”
#59. Watching Jon and Kate Plus 8.
#60. Youth Sunday – A parade of mediocrity
#61. Being Relevant
#62. Being slightly less nice than Mormons
#63. Rededicating your life, again.
#64. Fearing the rapture would come before you lost your virginity.
#65. Ending emails with God shout outs
#66. Eating your bodyweight in goldfish
#67. Editing pop culture
#68. Saying I don’t even own a TV
#69. Saving seats at church
#70. Discovering our spiritual gifts
#71. Calling things “postmodern”
#72. Love Offerings
#73. Getting caught of guard by divorce
#74. Youth group vehicles that break down, blow up and in general suck
#75. Quoting from the message when the regular bible is being disagreeable.
#76. Grape Juice
#77. Offering a safe approach to life.
#78. Using the Christian “F” word
#79. Journaling
#80. Fixing things with “mo prayer.”
#81. Disguising gossip as prayer
#82. Books that become empires
#83. Telling instead of showing.
#84. Stock Photography
#85. Hating your enemy in the church parking lot
#86. Publicity hating but secretly your facebook profile
#87. Throwing the G card.
#88. Associating “meditation” with yoga, candles and chanting.
#89. Knowing where not to be during the rapture.
#90. The tankini
#91. Seeing sins as a catapult
#92. The Shack
#93. Riding in the cool van at youth group
#94. Highly Specialized Bibles
#95. Fearing God will send you to Guam.
#96. Using God’s Favorite Word
#97. Getting angry that Ned Flanders slept with that girl
#98 Emerging from something
#99. Mixed Bathing
#100. MC Hammer’s Pray
#101. Letting anyone play music
#102. The Day after retreat blues
#103. Singing God is an awesome god
#104. Putting God in the liner notes
#105. Wishing your testimony was more exciting
#106. The Side Hug
#107. Sunday Sunday Sunday
#108. Not knowing how to hold hands
#109. Baby crack and veggie tales
#110. Donald Miller
#111. The Five Love Languages
#112. Trying to be liked
#113. Booty, God, Booty
#114. Not knowing how to act in a counselors office
#115. Kissing Dating Goodbye
#116. Using ‘let me pray about it’ as a synonym for no.
#117. The search for one more person
#118. Slowly turning against Oprah
#119. Saying in Christian love before you punch someone in the face
#120. Evangelism Tools
#121. Thinking God’s call will be long and detailed
#122. Redefining sin or how I justified doing drugs
#123. Flags, handbells and puppets
#124. The kid that makes out with girls from other youth groups
#125. The mandatory youth group goatee
#126. The Hype man
#127. Building a community of communities within a community
#128. Throwing stuff away out of guilt and then buying it again
#129. Chick-Fil-A
#130. Praying at people
#131. The bald worship leader
#132. Thinking God lost his A game
#133. Refusing to paint my mural
#134. Witnessing to people that don’t believe in the bible using the bible
#135. Dave Ramsey
#136. Dropping “wake up” phrases in sermons
#137. Holding retreats at places that could double for horror movies
#138. Saying I grew up in the church
#139. The Choir side step
#140. Telling the pastor what his kids have been up to
#141. Getting freaky deeky with the Song of Solomon
#142. Gloria Estefan’s “Coming out of the dark”
#143. Getting your kids beat up
#144. Wishing sin was not fun
#145. Weird Dating sites
#146. Casually writing books about God
#147. Trust Falls
#148. War Themed Ministries
#149. Boycotting stuff
#150. Waiting on God
#151. Francine Rivers, the Thoenes and other books with windswept people on the cover.
#152. A liberal use of exclamation points!!!
#153. Grossly underpaying the designer of the salvation illustration
#154. Breaking up after a retreat
#155. Painfully named divorce ministries
#156. Telling you how many people come to our church
#157. Testamints – Sending bad breath to hell
#158. Calling someone pastor instead of their first name
#159. The pray if you feel led prayer
#160. The bait and switch
#161. Refusing to make music you can slow dance to
#162. Pimping your kids from the pulpit
#163. The mysterious arrival of the letter e
#164. The Christian version of speed dating
#165. The double sermon. Four warning signs
#166. Telling the people around you that God loves them.
#167. Believing in calendars
#168. Printing bulletins on ink repelling paper
#169. Clapping our hands
#170. Email Forwards
#171. Meticulous, Magnificently Making Multiple Messages Match (M)letters.
#172. Letting Porn Win
#173. The Crock Pot, a love letter.
#174. Forcing little kids to sing at the end of your song
http://stufffchristianslike.blogspot.com/2008/04/175-godisgoodandbeautiful777yahoocom.html
#176. Giving open flames to kids on Christmas Eve.
#177. Singing duets with sunsets and waterfalls
#178. Overusing your one seminary word
#179. Referring to that one Jesus clears the temple verse when you get angry
#180. Patronizing the baby Christians
#181. Preaching an 87 week long sermon
#182. Saying “pot blessings” instead of “pot lucks”
#183. The passion of the Christ
#184. That table and chair ministers use on stage.
#185. Good enough for the church (or God’s love letter to artists)
#186. You down with OPP? Whoops, I meant G.O.D.
#187. Leaving room for the holy spirit when you dance.
#188. Judging someone’s faith based on their Bible underlining.
#189. The (G)DTR
#190. Hating Church Marketing (And how God invented it.)
#191. Committees on committees about committees
#192. Using “love on” as a verb.
#193. Fist fights in church softball games
#194. Traveling Mercies
#195. Believing bad times equals bad us.
#196. The secret bathroom at church.
#197. Super Spiritual
#198. Orange Drink
#199. Refusing to take compliments
#200. Confessing roughly 37% of your junk in premarital counseling
#201. Tagging kids like whales at Sunday school
#202. Thinking Vegas is slightly worse than hell
#203. Not knowing what meals to pray before
#204. Thinking temptation just kind of happens
#205. Frisbee – God’s Favorite Sport
#206. Putting the devil on notice
#207. Kicking old ladies in the face
#208. Christianizing your facebook profile
#209. Counting swears in movies
#210. Judging people you see jogging on Sunday morning
#211. The youth group hot seat
#212. Shrinking God
#213. Not knowing how to baptize tall people
#214. Disguising Baby Beauty Pageants as Baby Dedications
#215. Reading through the bible
#216. Precious Moments
#217. Giving mediocre high school graduation gifts
#218. Confusing never with ever
#219. Melon Farmer! Melon Farmer!
#220. The kid crying that makes every kid cry at Sunday School.
#221. Convincing youth group girls to make out with you
#222. The “First time visitors” message.
#223. Well actually, the Sabbath is a Saturday.
#224. Lying because I love you.
#225. Turning ushers into the secret service.
#226. Promise Rings (6 New SCL Versions)
#227. Narnia.
#228. NIV vs. KJV vs. ESV (Bible wars told via GI Joe)
#229. Margin or life balance or what $3 get you.
#230. Looking in the offering basket or bucket.
#231. Drinking Coffee in church.
#232. The magical power of denim
#233. Reading every word in the bulletin when bored
#234. Bible verse arms race
#235. Confessing things around a campfire
#236. The Friend that went to counseling once and is now an expert on counseling you.
#237. Tipping with a tract
#238 Wishing you had partied more before becoming a Christian
#239. Offering 37 million different ministries at your church
#240. Kirk Cameron
Dear person that googled porn and got me.
#241. Awkward youth group rap
#242. Developing a highly sensitive “God-dar” (or how to spot a famous Christian)
#243. Going through seasons
#244. Making God EMo
#245. Casserole of Hope
#246. The smell of old hymnals
#247. A bizarre relationship with CAPITALIZATION.
#248 Christian Comedians
#249. Backsliding, a Christian thing or an Indiana Jones move?
#250. The Unicorn Hymn or worship song.
#251. The “Everyone is on vacation, anything goes church service”
#252 Youth leader that makes everyone cry during games with his over competitiveness.
#253. Painting God mad
#254. Secretly wanting to name your son “Aragorn” or your daughter “Arwen.”
#255. The song “Unwritten” by Natasha Bedingfield.
#256. Mission Trip Fund raising letters
#257. Eagles
#258 Taking a date to church
#259. Thinking faith is an event
#260. Drawing in the bulletin
#261. Parking in visitor parking
#262. Hoping TBS edits the Sex and the City movie, too.
#263. Competing in the “VBS classroom decorating wars.”
#264. When the pastor takes his coat off. (AKA, “It’s Relax time.”)
#265 Asking someone at VBS to watch “that kid” all week.
#266. Seeing your pastor in shorts only at VBS.
#267. Leaving things secretly in people’s mailboxes.
#268. Slow dancing with temptation.
#269. Understanding how Metrosexual your worship leader is.
#270. VBS Snacks
#271. Being afraid to use our gifts.
#272. Paying people “the Ministry Rate.”
#273. Powerpointing for the Lord
#274. Not knowing how to do a proper standing ovation
#275. Playing Red Rover at VBS.
#276. Doing super holy things for God
#277. Crazy Rapture Products
#278. Evander Holyfield
#279. The Senior Citizen volunteers at VBS.
#280. True Love Waits
#281. Using God as a financial plan.
#282. “Jesus Walks” by Kanye West
#283 Unwilling volunteer
#284 Willow Tree Figures.
#285. The lady worship leader.
#286. Secretly wanting to be a mega church.
#287. Father Abraham had many sons – the VBS mix tape
#288. Loving issues, liking people.
#289. Christian Cheers!! Christian Cheers!!
#290. The youth minister that tries to talk like the kids.
#291. Saying “I was just flipping channels” when you watch something you shouldn’t.
#292. Eating the homemade VBS play doh.
The SCL Dictionary.
#293. Not saying “but” enough.
#294. Confusing Ben Franklin with the Bible.
#295. Singing the 1st and 3rd verses of hymns.
#296. Fishbowling the drummer.
#297. Senior Pastor Syndrome
#298. Bringing Weird Stuff on Stage
#299. Playing hide and seek with God
#300. Civil wars between the pastor and the worship leader.
#301. The Prayer Grunt of affirmation.
#302. Prosperity or 28 ways Jesus blings
#303. Donating Junk to the church
#304. Sound guy Haiku
#305. Arguing about what a “real” ministry is.
#306. An “US Weekly” magazine approach to Atheists.
SCL Dictionary – Version 2
#307. Please turn to bible race
Remix #59 Jon & Kate Plus 8
#308. Torturing the janitor during VBS.
#309. Judgment Olympics
#310. Confusing god with blockbuster
#311. Those wacky VBS Themes.
#312. Talk Singing
Remix #14 Dating God instead of me.
#313. Liking the Bible less than Hunter Thompson like the Great Gatsby.
#314. Selling out or why I can’t shave my unibrow.
#315. Unaccountability Partner
#316. Final Performance Night at VBS
SCL Dictionary – Version 3
#317. Telling someone the sermon was for them.
#318. Profusely Perspiring Pastors
#319. Doves
#320. Making purple: 11 ways to stop camp kissing.
#321. The background music for prayers.
#322. Too many kaleidoscopes. Not enough telescopes.
#323. Trying to look cool at church.
#324. Dear blob, a love letter.
Remix – #36. Creating new types of services.
#325. The superhero guide to famous pastors.
#326. Using the Hermit Lie
#327. Conferences, AKA the Christian Prom
#328. Christian Music Festivals
Remix – #251 – The “Everyone is on vacation, anything goes” church service. (AKA tomorrow)
#329. Arguing about the “wives submit to your husbands” idea.
#330. Saying “if only”
#331. Missionary family photos – Part 2 of 2
#331. Missionary family photos – Part 1 of 2
#332. That dude with the guitar at camp.
#333. “Mayer” Christianity
#334. The “stop that” church hand grab.
Remix – #9. Comparing Braveheart to Christianity
#336. Praying with our hands on people.
#337. The guy that screams “Jesus!!!” at concerts.
#338. The last night cry fest at camp.
#339. Forgiveness (or lessons from the Cuban torture specialist)
Part 2 – The Super Hero Guide to Famous Pastors
SCL Dictionary – Version 4
#340. Liquefying God’s Love
#341. Being Switzerland (Or me and the “Family Guy”)
#342. Biblically named ropes courses.
#343. Hades Hot or Snow Cold – the two sanctuary temperatures
#344. God: author of life, the Bible and billboards.
#345. Hand Raising Worship – The 10 Styles
Remix – #34. Subtly finding out if you drink beer too.
#346. Worship leaders that add the word “and” to songs.
#347. Using faith as “God currency.”
#348. Pastor’s Wives – The 3 Types
#349. Shining up our scars.
#350. The Whisper of Importance
#351. The Worship Leader that wants to be a Preacher
#352. Preachers that want to be Worship Leaders.
#353. Camp food.
#354. Holy phone ring tones.
#355. Warning friends that your new friend is a non-Christian.
#356. The 7 Types of Christian Camp Counselors
#357. The prayer version of “You Stay Classy San Diego.”
Remix – #63. Rededicating your life. Again.
#358. Color coding salvation.
#359. Arguing about taking little kids to big church.
#360. Jessica Simpson – Should we take her back?
#361. Taking God Seriously
#362. The movie “Facing the Giants”
#363. The Camp Testi-whoa-ny
#364. Feeling unqualified for “that thing”
Remix – #92. The Shack
#365. Mission Trip Souvenirs (or the sandals that prove you’ve been to Africa.)
#366. Holy quotes at the end of emails.
#367. Asking for money at church.
#368. Massages during church. (A manifesto against them)
#368. Part 2 – Fans of Church Massages Respond
#369. The magical things that happen on stage when you close your eyes to pray.
#370. Getting addicted to religion.
Remix – #93. Riding on the cool van in youth group.
#371. The dude that drinks the water and gets sick on mission trips
#372. The marriage triangle.
#373. The Prayer Ninja
#374. “<><” – Christian Emoticons
Remix – #16. Greeting the people around you.
#375. Forgetting who we are.
#376. Falling in love on a mission trip.
#377. The music minister that gives his wife all the solos.
#378. The mission trip airport layover.
#379. Michael Phelps sermon illustrations
#380. The rapper’s guide to televangelists.
#381. Accountability
#382. Perfectly timing your communion walk.
Remix – # 256. Mission Trip Fundraising Letters (And why I should write your next one.)
#383. Christian hate mail, a how to guide.
#384. Mission Trip Leader Fanny Pack Syndrome
#385. Always sitting in the same seat at church
#386. The greatest exercise-focused Bible verse ever.
#387. Thinking our junk will shock God.
#388. The 11 signs of a wicked awesome mission trip interpretative dance song.
#389. Church Mafia – The 4 Ruling Families
#390. The 13 things you don’t want to hear on a mission trip.
#391. The Holy Sounding Mascot Game
#392. Treating God like the dentist.
Remix – #53. Saying “I’ll pray for you” and then not.
#393. Family Fish Bumper Stickers
#394. Dressing up for Sunday lunch in college so it looks like you went to church.
#395. The Christian version of Guitar Hero.
#396. Rounding up your attendance for God.
#397. Feeling too small for God.
#398. The 5 Types of College Chapel Speakers
#399. Using words you learned in counseling.
Remix – #245. The Casserole of Hope
#400. Homeschooling
#401. Jesus, the sports hero.
#402. Thinking God is far away.
#403. Stuff Christians Like/Stacy From Louisville Cooperative For the Preservation Of The Integrity of Bible College Love Super Quiz 2008
#404. Grand Theft Auto Xian Edition
#405. Saying, “The Bible” when asked what your favorite book is.
#406. Meeting famous pastors.
#407. Christian Singing Groups
#408. The Double Greeting
#409. Treating God like Letterman treated Carson.
#410. The Youth Group Intern
#411. Labeling people “the next Billy Graham.”
#412. The Christian Energy Drink.
#413. Trying to find a cause.
#414. Secret singing.
#415. The 5 stages of emailing friends an unintentionally funny Christian video.
#416. The 3 Rules of Movie Sermon Analogies
#417. Fatal after Church Restaurant Mistakes.
#418. Throwing rocks at squirrels.
Caption this photo.
#419. Bass Player Face
Remix #81. Disguising gossip as prayer.
The world’s largest side hug photo.
#420. Embellished Blazers
#421. Empty Room Lessons
#422. Singing when you’re supposed to be praying.
Remix #304. The Sound Guy/Gal Haiku
#423. Creating the holiest church logo possible. A how to guide.
#424. Three new names for “Blended Worship”
#425. The little David Caruso on our shoulders.
#426. Upward basketball
Remix #41. Making music that is impossible to exercise to
#427. Inducting Coldplay into the “Sounds Almost Like a Christian Band Hall of Fame”
#Remix 137. Holding retreats at locations that could double as horror movies.
#428. Folding under the pressure of passing the offering plate.
#429. Treating God like a Juice Machine.
Remix – #54. Halloween Hating
#430. Pretending to like C.S. Lewis.
#431. Boys vs. Girls Tithing
#432. The Election Post You Have to Write
#433. Something God never says to us.
#434. Gross Food Related Youth Group Games
#435. Holding church in odd locations.
#436. Arguing about giving from gross or net.
#437. Living better or new?
#438. Refusing to let people borrow your pen in church.
#439. The church offering envelope.
#440. Not knowing what to do with yoga.
#441. Claiming songs from the 80’s for Jesus. (Or “I yell at Cyndi Lauper”)
#442. Teaching yourself to breathe underwater.
Remix #32. Lasers instead of stained glass.
#444. Avoiding Your Favorite Christian Radio Station Like the Plague During Share-a-Thon Week
#445. How Christian is Your Cubicle?
#446. The Secular Culture Parental Filter or “How I almost got to listen to Europe.”
#447. The Jelly Bellies of Christendom.
#448. Judging people that use iPhones during church.
A Chrismas Classic – #173. Dear Crock Pot, a Love Letter
#449. Wondering if God is enough.
#450. Breaking the Chains
#451. The 7 Sports Myths Christians Like
#452. Leg dropping elves. (Or the real meaning of Christmas)
#453. A hate mail mongoose. (Or the Pastor’s Gift Guide.)
#454. Wishing faith was convenient.
Ninja Stars and Candles – Remix #176. Giving open flames to kids on Christmas Eve.
#455. How Christmawesome is your Christmas Sweater?
#456. Christmas Shoes, Greatest Song Ever?
#457. My jail mustache (Or giving people three gifts this year)
#458. Fixing our motives.
Kinky Lingerie for Missionaries or Remix #303 – Donating Junk to the Church
#459. Women’s Ministry Christmas Tea
#460. Manger Management
#461. Christmas
#462. Making Christian-Flavored Resolutions
Hate Mail, Haikus & More. It’s the end of the year wrap up.
Psalty, Skittles and the best moment of the year.
#463. Jeff Buckley and the unexplainable.
#464. The official point system of SCL commenter fitness.
#465. 30 Rock is the new Office (and 5 other TV Shows that could be Sermons)
#466. Wearing a Bluetooth earpiece at church.
#467. Great Sex! Flat Abs! And Jesus!
#468. Sharing an email address with your spouse.
#469. Thinking you’re supposed to be a minister.
#470. The American Idol like sermon audition pastoral candidates have to do.
#471. Falling asleep in church.
#472. Wishing every idol was as honest as Harley Davidson.
#473. WOTAM baby, straight up WOTAM. (Christian Text Abbreviations).
#474. Leaving Bibles in the Lost & Found – An Open Letter
#475. Going green for God.
Remix #31. Occasionally Swearing
Bronze baby! Bronze!
#476. Facebook friend suggesting Jesus.
#477. When the pastor calls someone out from the pulpit.
#478. Sitting next to sick people at church.
#479. Critiquing the sermon at lunch.
#480. Guilt trips.
Remix #2. Saying “bless her heart.”
#482. Talking about the end of the world.
#483. Feeling guilty for rooting against the Christian guy in the Super Bowl.
#484. When people you are witnessing to think you are hitting on them.
#485. Making your church smell so fresh and so clean.
#486. Finding God in nature.
Remix #154. Breaking up after a retreat.
#488. Planting new churches.
#489. Not knowing how to drop a kid off at Sunday School.
Remix #47. Rooting for secret Christians on American Idol.
#490. Giving people the easy stuff.
#491. Saying “let’s pray” when you mean “let’s make out.”
#492. Creative Niche Ministry Groups.
#493. Getting single people married as fast as possible.
#494. Sin Synonyms – Pretty ways to say an ugly word
#495. Wondering if we’re worth anything.
Yo Joe! Remix #228. NIV vs. KJV vs. ESV (Bible wars told via GI Joe)
#496. Crafting the Perfect Christian Dating Profile
#497. Giving your kid a Biblical name.
#498. Finding subtle ways to tell your pastor to “wrap it up.”
#73. Getting caught off guard by divorce.
#499. Having a favorite book of the Bible.
#500. Lists
