The other day at Catalyst, pastor Andy Stanley told a story about the day he realized he was judgmental. As a pastor’s kid he grew up knowing all the right answers. As a pastor himself, he knew the Bible inside and out. He thought over the years he had learned not to judge other people in unkind ways, but his counselor thought otherwise. Finally, after lots of back and forth, his counselor asked him a question, “How would you have responded when Peter denied Christ three times?” Before Andy could catch himself and say the right answer he blurted, “He’s out.” The counselor smiled and said, “And how did Christ respond?” Busted, with a grimace, Andy answered, “He pretty much had Peter lead the whole thing after that.”
Now that’s not an exact quote because I was busy judging someone or something at the time and didn’t take notes. But in my own life I don’t need dramatic moments to realize I struggle with unfairly judging people. I see evidence of my own nonsense all the time and recently caught myself judging them in a completely crazy location:
A Southwest Airplane.
I didn’t intend to. I didn’t set out to make flying a “judging jamboree” but it’s become one for me. Here are three ways I tend to judge people while flying on Southwest:
1. The ticket line.
You don’t get an assigned seat on Southwest. It’s kind of first come, first shove, first serve kind of situation. Your boarding pass puts you in either A, B or C group and then when you’re called, you line up according to your number. (I feel like A stands for Aisle, B for back of the plane, and C for “C if you can cram yourself into the worst seats left.) When I’m B38 I stand by the pole that says “31-40” and then I immediately try to read everyone’s ticket. My chief concern is that there will be some cutters or line jumpers. I’m almost positive that they’ll run out of seats before I get on the plane and I’ll have to sit on the wing for the entire flight. So I am constantly visually eavesdropping on my line neighbors and judging them.
2. The seat selection.
Once you’re on the plane, you have to walk down the aisle and quickly decide whom you want to sit with. It’s a seat free for all and feels a little like an episode of “Plane Bachelor.” Who will it be? Who will I commit to spending up to four hours next to? Who looks like they have some weird homemade snack they’re going to eat the entire flight? Like “tunafish crumbles.” Who looks like they’re sleepy and might try to spoon and cuddle on my shoulder for a few awkward hours? Who looks like they might be an “armrest dominator,” constantly battling me for possession of the armrest? Judge. Judge. Judge. (And if I’m in group A and get to sit down in a seat first, I just naturally assume the people in group B and C are judging me while they walk down the aisle.)
3. The carry on situation.
I get inappropriately tense about the status of my carry on luggage. My wife used to hate flying with me because the moment we got to the airport, I left her behind while I went into “the zone.” The “will there be an overhead compartment available for my carry on bag,” zone. All other words and distractions just ricocheted off my bubble of concentration as I tensed up. I also took that “will it fit” size measurement very seriously. Turns out not everyone thinks that way. People tie like 19 bags together with a belt and call it “one bag.” They put wheels on suitcases the size of baby grand pianos and try to magically cram them in the overhead. They bring an old school J Peterman jungles of Madagascar steamer trunk and call it their “personal item” which is supposed to be your purse or coat. Judge. Judge. Judge.
Sometimes when I write about stuff like this, people respond “that’s not how the church or Christians are supposed to be.” I agree. That’s the point of the post. I’m doing something whack, if you are too, let’s not. Except for number three. I’m almost positive the carry on situation is a “respect the authority God has placed you under” situation. Respect the “overhead compartment.”
Have you ever caught yourself being judgmental in an unexpected or crazy way?
