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Can we please get a secret handshake already?

August 14, 2012 by Jon

Is that too much to ask?

I know we’re doing life together.

And we’re in community.

And some of us are even going through seasons together, but in the midst of that, do you think there’s time for us to come up with a secret handshake?

It doesn’t have to be unnecessarily complicated like those “end with a snap” handshakes that swept the 1990s like Canada’s Snow. (The rapper, not the meteorological condition. Don’t act like you don’t remember him. He was one of the best white rappers from Canada in the 90s.)

Those snap handshakes were horrible. Why do you and I have to execute a snap together? If we both snapped on our own when we saw each other we would think “that is ridiculous. Why are we snap helloing? That makes no sense.” So then why do we have to do a synchronized snap? I never once had a good snap handshake where I walked away thinking, “That was a great snap. We really nailed it!”

Why do we Christians need a secret handshake?

So we won’t witness to each other on airplanes.

That’s an impossibly awkward situation. You see the stranger next to you reading their Bible and taking deep, “pre-airplane witness breaths.” And then they just launch into it, and suddenly you’re not headed to Baltimore with Southwest, you’re on the Romans Road with an accountant from Dallas.

If we had a handshake, we could immediately bust it out and know “Ohh, cool, I’m sitting next to a brother (or sister) in Christ. No need to try to convert them.”

Right now, when a fellow Christian tries to double convert me on a plane, the only thing I can do is blurt out “I’m down with the king! I’m in! But that guy next to you is reading 50 Shades of Gray!’”

It’s uncomfortable for all parties involved and will remain so until we’re able to get our own secret handshake.

Question:
Has a Christian ever witnessed to you?

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Jon Acuff is the New York Times Bestselling author of four books including his most recent, Start: Punch Fear in the Face, Escape Average & Do Work that Matters. Read More…

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