(It’s guest post Friday! Here’s one from Stephen Pepper. You can check out his blog here. You can also follow him on Twitter @youthworkinit. If you want to write a guest post for SCL, here’s how!)
The Haiku Bible
The Bible is full of different types of writing: narrative, poetry, imagery, history, prophecy, etc. You know one thing it doesn’t have? Haikus.
What’s a haiku? It’s a form of Japanese poetry that has 17 syllables, in the form of three phrases with 5, 7 and 5 syllables respectively. It made me wonder though: Is it because it’s Japanese poetry that it didn’t appear in the Bible? Or could it be because 5-7-5 is only one step away in each instance from 6-6-6?
I’ve taken the liberty of converting some parts of the Bible into haiku form. Just think of it as The Message, Japanese-style.
In the beginning
There was absolutely zilch
After six days? Loads (Genesis 1)
God made light and dark
Fish, animals and people
But why mosquitos? (Genesis 1)
Man made from the dirt
Woman made from the man’s bone
Gotta love spare ribs (Genesis 2:20-22)
God – do not look back
Lot’s wife – just one little look
Salty, not Psalty (Genesis 19:1-26)
Sacrifice your son
OK Lord, here you go
You know what Abe – psych! (Genesis 22:1-12)
Stairway to heaven
Angels walking up and down
But no Robert Plant (Genesis 28:12)
Who’s Methusaleh?
Lived to almost a thousand
No Botox back then (Genesis 5:27)
Plagues – blood, frogs, boils
Gnats, locusts, firstborn and more
Dude – just let them go (Exodus 7 – 11)
A man called Balaam
Had a donkey that could speak
No, this isn’t Shrek (Numbers 22:28)
David got some stones
Killed giant, cut off his head
Rest is history (1 Samuel 17)
I’ll get you pregnant
Have your husband killed at war
That’s bad isn’t it (2 Samuel 11)
Put bull on altar
Call down fire from heaven
Ultimate grilling (1 Kings 18:33-38)
Your wife’s quarrelsome?
She’s a dripping leaky roof
Don’t say that to her (Proverbs 19:13)
Que sera sera
Whatever is now has been
And what’s now will be (Ecclesiastes 3:15)
Old men will dream dreams
Your young men will see visions
Cheese eaten at night (Joel 2:28)
Shortest Bible verse?
We all know it’s “Jesus wept”
Shorter than haikus (John 11:35)
Men should have short hair
Women should have longer hair
Alopecia? Dang (1 Corinthians 11:14-15)
Woman rides a beast
With seven heads and ten horns
That’s some crazy stuff (Revelation 17:7)
Question:
What Bible Haikus can you come up with?
(For more great writing from Stephen, check out his blog!)
