Christian Song Parody Writing
Before you run away and hide, we know you’re out there. Yes you, the ones who rewrite secular songs with Christian lyrics. I know you exist because my dad is one of you. If it was played by an 80s hair band, you better believe that he’s thrown some Jesus in that.
Don’t be frightened. I’m a fan of the Christian song parody writer! But since I haven’t seen a tweet from the governing Christian council (does that even exist? Someone surely had to make the ruling that skinny jeans were cool for worship leaders), I’d like to formally propose some right here so we can avoid any more “I like Christian girls and I can not lie” situations:
1. It has to be relevant. As far as I’m concerned, all classic rock will forever be relevant so a little Lynyrd Skynyrd “Sweet Home up in Heaven” is perfectly acceptable. Completely relevant to our future hope. Maybe a little Bruno Mars? “Jesus caught a grenade for ya, he stood in front of a blade for ya.” Completely relevant to Jesus’ sacrifice on the cross…kind of.
2. Don’t be cheesy. We don’t need any Kiss parodies that go, “I wanna witness all night, and witness every day!” And we really don’t need some CeeLo “I saw you driving round town with the girl I love, and I’m like, I forgive you!” Let’s keep it a little higher quality than that.
3. Absolutely no Gaga. I’m pretty sure I don’t need to say this. But hey, Jon Acuff did call “50 Shades Of Grace” and sure enough it happened, so let’s outlaw Lady Gaga right here right now. I’ll give her a little credit: she’s a beast at piano, but that’s where I draw the line. Besides, no one wants to see Matt Redman in a meat dress…
4. No explicit or suggestive content. “I’ve got the moves like Jesus” is not ok.
5. Remember copyright law. Don’t go out and publish your parodies without the proper documentation. I really don’t want to be the catalyst for a Christian copyright infringement movement.
I hope that lays forward some good guidelines for all you parody writers. Together we can save us from ourselves.
What’s a song that you would rewrite?